Journey

My Mission Statement is who I am, how I perceive myself, and it’s also the things I strive to be.

I will understand and be understood.
I will trust and be trustworthy.
I will think win/win.
I will defend those who are absent.
I will respect and be respected.
I will maintain a positive attitude.
I will keep a sense of humour.
I will Learn and Teach.
I will be there for my family and friends for love and support.
I will believe in others and myself.
I will help others and thank those who help me.
I will remember to live for the day for tomorrow may be too late.
I will show love rather than expect it.
I choose to make a difference in this world.
And most importantly, I will go through life with a smile on my face.

I will understand and be understood.
This means that first I will try and understand a person, before overridding them with my thoughts and beliefs on the subject, I will try and listen to that person, their reasons to why they believe whatever they believe, and then understand their point of view. As human beings, I believe that we all have the right to say what we believe, but that means nothing, if you cannot listen to another’s point of view and actually understand why they believe what they believe.

I will trust and be trustworthy.
This is so important to me. I love honesty so much, it makes everything worthwhile. I learnt a lot about trust from the internet. Trusting that the person that you are chatting to is telling you the truth about themselves, and being honest about things. Now I have put that into practice in “real life”, where I pretty much demand people to be honest with me, even if they believe it will hurt me. In all honesty, truth DOES in fact hurt, but not nearly as much as lies and deceit do.

I am so honest, and I probably do hurt people along the way. And I do get hurt sometimes when I hear the truth about myself. But hearing the “truth” brings change – good change. If, for instance, someone was getting really angry at something you do, or something you said, and keep it to themselves, how will you know to stop doing that particular thing? If people are honest with you, and tell you “blah blah, this really annoys me!”, then I can stop, evaluate the situation, and yes, be a little hurt too, (especially if you didn’t know that you were bothering someone), but at least it will make you think about your actions, and maybe even stop doing whatever it was that bothered them.

I will think win/win.
This one was a hard one to put into my mission statement. It’s something I know I should do, and would love to be, but am still trying to be able to do it. I am a bitch, in the sense of, well, I like to win all the time. Since writing this statement about 2 months ago, I believe I have started to use this process. I am trying to see the third alternative  where all parties win. So that I still win, but noone else loses.

I will defend those who are absent.
Nothing is more complimenting than having someone, even someone you aren’t very close to, defend you while you are absent. In everyday life, you get bitching. You get people who are either jealous or trying to better themselves in someone else’s eyes, putting down others to bring themselves up, does that make sense? ah, who cares, it’s late, but anyway, this is truly a hard thing for any individual to do. I have started to do it since writing this statement, and it’s truly a good thing. If someone says something bad about another, that is either unjustified or too harsh, either 1. don’t agree with them, 2. don’t say anything at all, or 3. stand up to them, stand up for them. Make it known that you think it’s wrong for them to be talking that way about that person. You will find that many trust you more. Don’t lie though! Don’t do it to start arguments or to suck up, or whatever, do it, because you really believe it.

I will respect and be respected.
I have always been one to demand respect, from my family, from my friends, from strangers. I don’t know where the heck I got this trait, but it’s a killer. I want to be able to respect others as well as keep my respect. I don’t want people to fear me as they have done, I want them to respect who I am, and I want to be able to do the same for them.

I will maintain a positive attitude.
For years I have had the firm belief that “everything will be ok”. It’s called optimism, and although sometimes you look completely stupid for saying it, I believe it important. If you think things won’t be ok, then lo and behold they won’t be. If you have that belief in you, that optimism that says “don’t worry, we’ll work out something, everything will be ok”, then you are on the right path for finding a way to get passed whatever the problem is.
Negative attitudes never get you anywhere. People who are negative, have less friends, and less goals achieved. It’s a fact.

I will keep a sense of humour.
I have always held a sense of humour, except when it comes to sex or anything sexual.
In school, I was “the funny one”, the entertainer. In growing up and having a lot of terrible things happen to me, I haven’t kept up that sense of humour that I once had, excepting those that have my total trust, which is usually those on the net. I don’t know, something about the people in real life: it’s like it’s all so fake, and you just don’t know what’s funny anymore because of all the sarcasm put in place instead of humour, you sometimes seriously don’t know if you are laughing at yourself!

I will Learn and Teach.
Since I was just a tiny tacker, I have been learning and teaching. It’s something in me that will never go away, although patience has started to fade a bit over the years. I love learning, I love knowledge, but most importantly, I love others to learn that knowledge to. I like knowing that I am bettering someone’s life. I like giving people knowledge that they didn’t have previously. Oh, I love teaching people about believing in themselves. Because I have the firm belief that we control our own destinies, and that anyone is capable of much greatness, of anything they want, with opportunity and desire and determination. It’s all so easy to give up on things, but it’s so much greater if you don’t give up.

I will be there for my family and friends for love and support.
Something I haven’t been doing for a long time. I had given up on “real people” when I got extremely addicted to the internet a couple of years ago, and although seem to have a fairly good relationship with my family now, I had negleted them for a long time, and have a lot of making up to do. I am so goddamn stubborn though, so it’s difficult to let down my barrier sometimes to give them that love and support that they need. I, also, have a lot of making up to do with friends that I had given up for the internet.

I will believe in others and myself.
Whenever anyone meets me, they will hear a lot about my beliefs, and hear a lot of questions from me, regarding their beliefs. I’m not talking about religion here, although I’m sure religion would be a good start to finding out why people are the way they are. But more so, believing in others to be able to do something. If you don’t believe someone can do something, then they most likely will a/ prove you wrong, or b/ give up. You don’t want people to give up, give them that belief, and they will be able to do it. Don’t Pretend to believe in them, actually believe in them! It’s important! People achieve so much more when they are treated as being more.
For example, in the computing industry: If, for instance, you treat someone like they are a receptionist, that’s all they’ll be. If, you treat them like a manager, then they will act, and then become one. People act the way they are percieved: TRY IT! Try treating someone as if they are on a high pedastool. (No matter where you are). Try treating a cleaner as though they are really knowledgable in something, you will notice the change in them in a couple of weeks, it’s amazing what encouraging and believing will do to people.

I will help others and thank those who help me.
Something that I have always been the opposite of what I had previously believed until deciding to work out what kind of person I wanted to be. Our whole family seems a bit this way. We don’t thank anyone for gifts, or if we do, we feel so terrible about it. None of us give compliments, it’s just not in us to do so. I don’t even know where I got it from, or where they got it from. It’s so uncomfortable to thank someone, or to give them compliments, that we have avoided it for so long, and now have no idea how to do it! So this is a huge challenge for me. To try and get over whatever it is preventing me from being nice to people, whatever it is that is preventing me from giving them compliments or thanking people for gifts, and to actually help others.

I will remember to live for the day for tomorrow may be too late.
Throughout my life there are things that I have done, that I wouldn’t of done, if I had thought that I would live forever. Hmmm.. that sentence sorta sounds wrong, but I’ll try and explain. I am a chronic asthmatic, and when I was younger, it was a very serious ailment. I would be in hospital every other week, and for weeks at a time. I missed a lot of school, and was a very sickly child. When I grew older, the asthma became worse with stress (such as parent’s divorcing, etc), and I died a couple of times. I learnt at a very early age to hold on to life, to find life precious, and to live for the day. Following on to that, I started to smoke when I was about 15, and all of a sudden my asthma improved. Yeah, I know you are thinking bullshit, but I’m sure if you ask around (like I have done many times) to other asthmatics who smoke, most will say the same. That there asthma attacks became fewer and fewer when they started to smoke. Although, that is not the reason I started, and it’s sure not the reason I still smoke to this day. I do not in any way believe that smoking cures asthma, nor do I believe that anyone should take up smoking, whether they are asthmatic or not, but I’m just saying what happened for me. Anyway, about a year later, my doctor told me, in one of his desperate attempts to get me to quit smoking, that I wouldn’t live past 21. Well, I held onto his statement as if he had written it on paper and signed my death certificate! I believed I was going to die really young, and I did things that I would never of done, if I had thought that I was going to live longer. Lots of good things, but lots of terrible things too, such as not pay bills and things.. I was going to die anyway, right? Well, I was stupid, and am now making a big effort to pay off all those bills I had made since I was 15 years of age. 7 years of debt, and I want to do it this year. The guilt that debt brings onto you is amazing, and I can’t wait to rid of it all. Anyway, in short, I still believe that we CAN in fact, die at any time, and to not put off things that you believe are important. 

I will show love rather than expect it.
For years I wanted people to love me, I expected it, I almost demanded it. But now, I have realised, that I wasn’t showing ANYONE love, so why should I expect it from them? So, in my new “change” or whatever you call this, I shall learn how to show love to the people I love, and learn how to love. And not expect anyone to love me, as I believe it will come naturally once I start to show my love for them.

I choose to make a difference in this world.
This means that I want to change the world, I want to make it better, whether it’s making one person happy a day, or making someone who didn’t believe in themselves, start to believe in themselves, or whatever, I want to make a difference, I want to do it in whatever way possible. Whether through music, whether through my websites, or work, or home, or just through talking to people, I choose to make a difference in this world!

And most importantly, I will go through life with a smile on my face.
:)