Journey

DESPAIR

Those of Q’uo attempt to speak to this despair:
May each wanderer find comfort in the knowledge that it cannot help contributing positively to the planetary vibration. Even with what seems to be gross mismanagement of time and energy, yet still in that very basic alienated mindset there dwells that vibration which is fuller with light. This very alienation is simply a surface symptom of a deep and spiritual gift. Comfort yourself when the heart is heavy and the feelings bruised with the knowledge that you are being of service. You are doing that which you came to do. You may find ways to do it better, but you are not failing no matter what it seems like. 70 Q’uo, transcript dated May 22, 1994, p. 3.

The path I’ve chosen, or perhaps it’s better to say, has been chosen for me, is far from “normal”, even though I’m not sure what normal is. I’ve just found that expressing my unique and strange views on life and myself has brought more uncertainty into my life. Sometimes I feel so isolated and different that it scares me. Most times I think I’m a freak, yet I know, or at least feel, that there’s a reason to my pain. 77 Brisis, letter dated February 13, 1998. 115

Each entity walks alone, and this feeling of isolation is a tremendous source of suffering among your peoples. And yet when an entity stops looking for his feet and simply moves ahead, step by step, an unusual and unpredicted thing occurs, and that is that the steps of one who has stopped trying to see connections are more assured and livelier than those who are pressing with urgency against that envelope of blindness that surrounds the metaphysical self. 82 Q’uo, transcript dated November 3, 1996, p. 2.

There is a tremendous desire on the part of many wanderers to meet others of like mind.

Spiritual Exhaustion

It is well to do nothing until some insight into the fears and other emotions concerning this choice have become part of self-knowledge that can be first gazed carefully at and then surrendered. Thusly, if one were able, it could be said that the best way to make decisions is to wait and continue doing that which you are doing, while opening the self regularly and repeatedly in simple offering of thanks and praise and the desire to be sent forth, to allow light to shine through you. As you ask for this light to shine through, you begin to have the feeling that any road is good as long as this light is shining through you, as there is no exhaustion of spirit as long as the heart lies open, and the incoming undistorted light is then able to move through the transparent personality and out into the waiting and thirsty world. You yourself are thirsty for the light, yet that thirst in itself is a beginning of the deepest service. 103 Q’uo, transcript dated February 7, 1993, p. 6.

We can reliably say that none of you grasped just how difficult it would be to express faith in such a heavy and convincing illusion. It is safe to say that each felt more confident before incarnation than now, within incarnation, feeling battered and travel-weary with the dust of the spiritual road. Yet this road, dusty and in the desert so often, nevertheless feels right, and there is companionship upon this road as each meets others who have similar desires and yearn for similar service and learning. 105 idem, transcript dated November 15, 1998, p. 4.

We encourage each to catch those feelings of retreat and even panic, and to express to the self the word “remembrance”, for if the wanderer can but remember that there is a good reason for having come, there is a good reason for dealing with these entities, these groups, then there is still the weariness, still the pain, but also courage and strength that comes from the knowledge of who you are, why you are here and where you are headed.
107 idem, transcript dated April 28, 1996, p. 6.

If you are too weary to move on, if that is the sense that you get at this point, then we say to you: lighten the load. Remove expectations from your own self and allow yourself to play, to be as the daisies that dance upon the wind, carefree and blameless. You do not have to learn today. You do not have to work today. You have to do only that which is in your heart to do. 110 idem, transcript dated September 12, 1999, p. 3.

Download A Wanderer’s Handbook free from llresearch.org

My notes to contemplate:
[22] – Faith (as a Polarizing Necessity)
[21] – Polarity
[20] – Third Density & other Densities
[19] – Relationship Catalysts
[18] – Catalyst and Experience
[17] – The Veil of Forgetting
[16] – Karma
[15] – Reincarnation
[14] – Our Energetic Selves and How We Evolve
[13] – Transformation & Global Harmony
[12] – Positive Harvest = reach 51% service to others
[11] – Guilt as Opportunities for Forgiveness / don’t fight the darkness
[10] – A call to a life in faith
[09] – Despair, Faith, Fears, Distortions
[08] – Psychic Greetings / Attacks from Negative Entities
[07] – Pride, Ego, Surrender, and Elitism – We are all bozos on this bus!
[06] – Self-Doubt, Insecurity, Suffering & Hostility
[05] – Wanderers Purpose – Head to the heart.
[04] – Personality Disorders, Handicaps & Illness
[03] – I have never felt as if I belong.
[02] – Unseen Guidance / Unity, service and love.
[01] – You are here to bring light to a dark world.
More notes to be added as I keep reading through the material. I’ll add the additional links to new notes when completed on post #1 and post #22